Trolljegeren

Having the word 'Troll' in the title, we watched this expecting a bunch of amateur crapola that might at the most have unintentional laughter value.
We were very pleasantly surprised.
The film opens with familiar title cards announcing 'the following footage was recovered with no sign of the film crew, blah blah blah true story, real events etc', so far, so Blair Witch. The expected introductions to the crew are dealt with very swiftly as they embark on their pursuit of suspected bear poacher Hans Otto Jespersen. Also of note, is the lovely photography that establishes the Norwegian landscape and natural home of the titular trolls, which immediately lets you know that you are in for something special.
Writer/Director André Øvredal takes the Blair Witch/Cloverfield device and applies it perfectly to Norway's national monster myth. It strikes the balance between imagination and special effects, with some superb set pieces and genuine moments of tension. This is all the more impressive when you consider the outwardly silly image of the monsters themselves when taken out of context.
Imagine one scene in particular featuring three billy goats tied to a bridge as bait, reminiscent of the Tyrannosaur paddock in Jurassic Park, and you get the picture.
10/10

Supernatural

I'm a bit late jumping on board this bandwagon.
I never bothered with Supernatural when it started showing on UK television in the mid noughties. Mainly because it looked like a sub Angel/Buffy clone starring a couple of unknown beefcakes. So it stayed off my screens for several seasons. Then my dearly beloved other half said she'd caught a couple of episodes by chance and suggested we watch the show from the beginning as it appeared to have quite an ongoing storyline.

We gave it a try and chewed through the first couple of episodes. Then a couple more the following evening, and so on, until it became a daily habit.

We're on Season 4 now and I have to say it is as much fun to watch as Moffat's Doctor Who. That is to say; it is well written, true to form, doesn't take itself seriously and hasn't dropped the ball...yet.

It is how it looked; an Angel-type premise with more testosterone and the beefcakes were unknown, at least to me. However, the fun for me comes from the pop culture references in the script. Jensen Ackles Character Dean gets to rattle off the references that would make Lost's Sawyer jealous.

The Deep Doo Doo

This is about the second episode of the series of the Deep on BBC1 and about the depth the show has reached before I had to let go and let it keep sinking alone.

I like to be patronised. I love having someone speak to me like I'm so stupid I need an explanation of what is being said to me at the end of nearly every sentence. Especially sentences with long multi-syllable words in them. I am like this because I don't normally watch sci-fi techno thrillers that involve a great deal of tech/science/biology/physics as integral parts of the plot.
Wait a minute, what am I saying, of course I like sci-fi techno thrillers, I love The Abyss, Solaris, 2001, 2010 and so forth. I Hate to be patronised, it goes against my geek grain to have to be spoonfed in my favourite genre.


Which is a large reason why I began resenting The Deep, I became more and more infuriated with the dialogue which the poor cast had to spew out over each other. Here's a howling example from Minnie Driver's character: “Now listen. Samson is about to risk his life taking the one-man submersible into the hydrothermal vent field unsupported. Do you understand what that means?”
Lines like that were strewn throughout this heavy-handed and stupendously naive series that manages to take itself incredibly seriously whilst simultaneously treating its audience as though they were being allowed up past their bedtime.

The first episode was just about bearable; opening with a mysterious sub disappearance due to some'thing' that might be an undersea alien/monster/mutant or perhaps all of the above, seeing as it might be a lifeform from the unexplored world of hydrothermal vents. Cool, I thought, nothing like a spot of Cloverfield/Godzilla/Kraken action. They even chucked in a vampire squid cameo to hint at a possible 10,000 leagues under the sea drama. It was due to this fan-dance of hints that I put up with the highly derivative elements of sci-fi rescue mission movies gone classic. (see handy Amazon link for a selection of much better things to watch than the Deep.)

The second episode held my attention as the mystery of a huge mysterious submarine floating above our heroes' submarine unfolded. As our intrepid crew investigated the seemingly deserted hulk, they discovered dead crewmembers and I thought, lovely, could be a monster/aliens/mutation or perhaps all the above, that will reveal itself as a nice cliffhanger for ep3.

But no. It 'voz de Rah-chanz'.
Yes folks, the Orpheus submarine has either developed time-travel capability, or there is a wormhole down among them thar sea-bed hydrothermal vents that leads to the early 80's. It seems there is a giant supersub that has managed to avoid detection and roam the seas looking for oil to illegally drill that could start world war 3 or 4. This magnificent piece of super secret technology has managed to operate in secret despite being run by fat alcoholic Russian stereotypes and sneaky deadly smoking Spetznaz stereotypes, as well as leaking steam from miles and miles of creaky old soviet-era looking pipeways and gantries.

I sighed, I let go, the show sank and keeps on sinking. Never to be seen again.